“The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.”
Theodore Hesburgh
You won’t find me quoting Catholic priests too often – what with organised religion being one of the worst things to have manifested in this world – but I love the above excerpt.
I adore it because it’s so powerfully simple and understated. I mean, my daughter will form a long-lasting vision of what a man should be from me. Though I’m not entirely sure I’m up to the task of fulfilling such an important role, the implication I’ve overlooked is that the way I interact with her mum will form a strong basis for how she views adult relationships and partnerships should work.
I’m not the best husband and I know I need to be a better man, but it never occurred to me that it wouldn’t only be my wife that benefits from a shake-up of the husband skills.
You love your children. That’s an unshakable truth and you show them everyday that they are your world. You come home tired and sometimes you shout and snap at them, but deep down you love them and show them in many ways: playing with them, talking to them, listening…paying attention to them in so many ways.
And I see that if I don’t do the same with my wife, not only do I deprive her of a show of my affection, I show my daughter that this is normal and that a man doesn’t treat his wife with the same show of love as he does his children.
It’s really unsettled me because that’s really not cool. I’m not a bad person but I am undoubtedly remiss in showing my wife the love I have for her when I do the same for my children without fail.
Time to listen to the priest for once. 10 Hail Marys and let’s make sure this doesn’t happen again, my son.
Wearing The Daddy Pants 